High functioning isn’t necessarily a healthy thing

We hear this term bandied around all the time.
“So and so is a great leader because they are so high functioning,”
“They get the job done because they are high functioning.”

So let’s get something straight, just because someone is high functioning doesn’t mean they’re emotionally healthy, in fact, it can be exactly the opposite.

When you think of yourself or your team, who do you label as high functioning, and have you ever wondered what is underneath driving that functionality?

Many of the highest achievers I work with are some of the most emotionally avoidant. They avoid conflict of any kind (often causing more of it), they avoid making decisions, they avoid saying no to things.

Their backgrounds, including childhood and school experiences, have often left them a bit battered and war-torn. To counteract the negative feelings from these experiences, they become ‘high functioning’. This can mean they become workaholics (or alcoholics), pushing themselves to incredible limits to prove they are good enough.

Dyslexia, ADHD and Autism Spectrum Disorder (I hate the word ‘disorder’ here) are all known for being associated with ‘high functioning’ individuals, yet this is often a reaction to feeling that they couldn’t prove their worth as kids. I grew up feeling very stupid.

High functioning people have often built systems to mask their wounds. These systems might bring them incredible success, elite networks, and ironclad routines, but under the surface those old doubts niggle away at them and drive ever more systems and processes to keep the others going, processes to support your processes.

High functioning people often learned to survive by being impressive. They weren’t allowed to be messy, vulnerable or human. They could not fail because failing meant something enormous at a deep level:

I am a failure.
I am not worthy.
I can’t be a success.
I am unlovable.

So these leaders try to lead with perfection. They use every hack they can for increasing productivity, but they don’t work on the easiest hack themselves.

If you sort out your own internal baggage, leadership becomes super easy. You barely have to think about it. You’ll lead naturally and with presence.

Emotional health isn’t about how much you get done. It’s about how honest you are with yourself.

Can you admit when you’re tired?
Can you receive feedback without spiralling?
Can you ask for help without shame?

If not, your ‘high functioning’ might just be high compensating.

In my leadership work, I look for the hidden patterns that you’re using to be so high functioning. I check that they are really working for you in a healthy way. Burnout, isolation, being far too reactive, poor communication, these aren’t business issues, they are emotional ones.

You cannot leave your emotions at the door. If you try, you will end up locking them behind the door to your soul. You are you, wherever you are, doing whatever you do.

Real leadership requires emotional flexibility, the ability to stay open, not just efficient and robotic.

High functioning truly comes from having a clear head and heart, free of baggage and full of skill and opportunity. If you are working at a high level and the world is telling you you are winning, it’s very hard to admit something is missing.

That honesty is your true entry point to the freedom to be who you want and do the things you want, with success.

When the world tells you you’re winning, it’s hard to admit you’re struggling, but when you do, you unlock a whole new, successful version of yourself that finds life easier.

If you want to unlock your next level, start to think about the gap between where you are and where you want to be.