What leaders can learn from Thor: confidence, burnout and pressure
I love Marvel films. I just love that they always include a really healthy message. Stories have done this for years in different ways. Hansel and Gretel was to prevent kids from going into the woods, Red Riding Hood the same thing. We naturally use stories to learn. It surprises me the sudden interest in brand storytelling and personal brand stories as really, businesses have always used this to make us loyal and to buy their products. Apple doesn’t sell you a phone, it sells you a lifestyle and an identity.
What happens when confidence and identity take a hit
Marvel just do it so well. I would love to speak to their script writers if any of you have a connection!
Do you remember Avengers Endgame? Thor – worshipped by so many people as sexy, fit, funny etc, suddenly puts on weight and gets depressed. If I hadn’t been surrounded by so many people in the cinema I would have jumped up and down with joy when I saw it.
Thor gets depressed about everything going wrong. He couldn’t save everyone after all. His confidence and identity in tatters, he starts comfort eating (most of us have been there). He stops exercising and he wallows in all the things he feels he’s failed out. Sound familiar?!
In leadership, this doesn’t always look obvious. It can show up as withdrawing, second-guessing decisions, losing energy or motivation, or quietly questioning your own capability without saying it out loud.
Why high-performing leaders struggle silently
I work with so many men who feel this. I’m going to be honest, women seem to talk to their friends more and so they don’t feel this so acutely as their friends boost them up. Men hang on to their feelings worried that they will be even more of a failure if they admit these feelings. So the feelings grow. Do you know there is evidence that if we sit and talk or think about negative things we actually make ourselves feel worse! It’s measurable in our brains. That’s why I love the way I work because it’s about resolution and moving forwards rather than wallowing. Brief wallows are allowed.
How to rebuild confidence under pressure
What a wonderful model Marvel sets by taking such a ‘strong’ character and giving him such human attributes. I wonder how many millions of men stopped holding their breath and their stress. I wonder how many saw that film and on the way home used that film to start a conversation with someone who would support them about how they felt.
Marvel, I just love you.
If you recognise this in yourself, you don’t have to stay there. Get in touch for a conversation about how executive coaching and executive therapy can help you rebuild confidence and clarity under pressure.